January Ramblings...

1/18/10

How many brown sugar packets does it take to fill one cup? 43.

Today one of my students asked me whether it was February 14th. I gave him a puzzled look and said, “No, it’s still January. Why?” He then wanted to know why I was wearing a red coat when it wasn’t Valentine’s Day. I happened to also be wearing a pink sweater, but he didn’t comment on that.

My banana bread didn’t really turn out that great today. It was kind of dry. I used a new recipe. I think I’ll revert back to the old one. I was able to make six different plates of bread slices out of the two loaves. Four have been delivered, and I’m hoping to do the other two tomorrow. Sometimes (well, often), I feel like I have no idea what I’m doing. I don’t know how to be a worker. I don’t know how to reach out or develop relationships with ** women. What are the rules? What’s the timeline? Then I remember that it isn’t about rules or a timeline.

1/19/10

We had power all day today, but tonight it’s going crazy. I think that’s due to the storm we’re having. It’s loud - windy, etc.

Last night there was either a mouse or a cockroach in my room. It woke me up. I got so scared that I had to call my roommate on her cellphone to come and rescue me. Afterwards I was so embarrassed. The power was out, and I was too scared to get out of bed. She’s incredibly kind. I still feel bad about it. She told me today that it took her awhile to go back to sleep. What’s more is that after I finally fell back asleep, I had a nightmare about cockroaches. Gross. Today I cleaned out my room and vacuumed.

This morning I drove for the first time in **. It was amazing. I wasn’t stressed at all. Ruth made me a little bit nervous because she seemed tense. I felt like I was 15 again. It’s amazing what those 20 minutes in the car did for my sense of independence and freedom. After we were done I was in such a great mood. It’s almost as if it gave me a sense of accomplishment. I can’t speak the language, I can’t go some places alone, I don’t understand the culture, etc., etc. BUT I drove. It felt good.

Finally finished Honorably Wounded. Some chapters were really good and very applicable. Others, ehhh. However, I’d definitely recommend it to anyone going into any kind of service or ministry. I need to go back and meditate on a couple more of the chapters, specifically the one on working through negative emotions.

My next goal is to finish The Pursuit of God. I’d like to read that and Humility by February 10th. We’ll see. I need to be careful not to get into the habit of simply doing things in order to cross them off my list. Instead, I need to enjoy the process of learning, experiencing, accomplishing, growing, etc. It’s not about the end, it’s about the way.