Last week a single man came to my house and asked to see me. He already knew where I lived and told my roommate with confidence that if I was home, he wanted to see me. He didn't even bother to ask if it was the right house. At first it looked like he wanted to come inside, and I firmly told him that I couldn't ask him inside. He then suggested that we sit in his car. Confused and bewildered at his boldness, I again said no and asked what he wanted. It turns out that he wanted help with some immigration forms. I started to suggest he go to the center where I work - that we'd be happy to help him there, but he explained that he'd already been there and then described, using colorful language I might add, that he hadn't received help and he wouldn't be going back. He wanted my help. At a loss for what to say, embarrassed that this man was standing in front of my house, and feeling exposed and vulnerable, I told him that I had to work for the rest of the day, but that if he gave me his phone number I might be able to help him another day. He scribbled the numbers on a piece of paper and said "Ensha'alla" under his breath. Then he drove away.
This was one of my first students. He lingered after class sometimes. He called me sister and then later asked to take me out to dinner. One afternoon a friend and I ran into him downtown and he invited us to lunch. After promptly refusing, he offered again - explaining that he would drive us in his car. Needless to say, his actions were a tad (or very) inappropriate for this culture.
A few days later I had another uncomfortable situation happen involving a taxi driver who decided to lurk around for awhile in order to talk to me and get my phone number.
This morning the former student showed up again - twice within an hour. I was enjoying a lazy morning just reading the Word and exercising, so, sporting sweatpants and an old long sleeve shirt, I wasn't about to open the door to anyone. A peek under the gate revealed my unwelcome guest. Each time he knocked and waited patiently for a few minutes before driving away.
*sigh*
Up until the last couple of weeks, I've felt so safe here. With the exception of an unusual event last summer, I've felt nothing but kindness and gentleness from the men here. They may come across as a bit too friendly or they may allow their eyes to linger longer than I'd like, but that happens everywhere.
Today I'm feeling very .... single and without a family. E-mailing my dad or letting my local "brothers" know about the situation just isn't the same thing as having a guy to go "deal" with this former student at the gate.
I realize that in this day and age there is a trend that promotes female independence, and yet there is something to be said about having a covering of protection. It's Biblical, it's comforting, and it makes sense. While I can't magically make this uncomfortable situation disappear or conjure up Dad or a protective guy friend [here], I can rest in God's promises as my ultimate Protector.
"You hem me in behind and before, and you lay your hand upon me." Psalms 139
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